I couldn't open my eyes, was too tired even tho I had what, 5hours of sleep in the afternoon and 6hours of sleep at night? I couldn't go back to sleep so I started thinking about - again, for God knows what reason why. Then I felt damn pathetic.
Tossed and turned, tried to get some shut eye but couldn't. I just started crying cuz I got all frustrated. Searched up some things on being mentally and emotionally drained, and for some reason I wanted to read my bible even tho I've not for a damn long time.
Went to search for it in my cupboard, where I usually put it.
To my ultimate horrors of horrors, I COULDN'T FIND IT. Omg it really meant a lot to me, especially since it was a gift from shepherd Yining! :( I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE MOVING MY STUFFS AROUND!!
http://realityworks.blogspot.com/2006_07_01_archive.html
Read on how it was like for me during interschools when I was sec1. The part where I chipped Tzuling's daggerboard and tiller extensions was hell funny. As I read my posts I remembered how horrible and guilty I felt, even tho it chipped off when Wenfeng (?) or someone helped me to recover my boat. Me, Ryan and David chipping our daggerboards together was the worst yet funniest part! Haha.
Some part of me is eagerly awaiting interschools..
2 more weeks guys!
To the sec4s:
Lets give it our best shot! For these two weeks, its time to chiong. Take charge of PT and show the juniors what we're really made of! 4 years of training and disicipline. :) you guys are like THE most awesome people I've ever met (besides AGEK), taking care of me like a little sister since there are only 2 girls and I'm like the most baby/weak one in our batch (Quinnie's tougher). Love you guys to the max!
Think I'll be going down to sail later even tho I'm still feverish now.
At least someone won't be able to diss me for my fitness. Cuz for your information, if theres one thing I don't like, its someone talking about me for my fitness level. And no Nic W., it wasn't you, and Ryan, it wasn't Jack.
Try almost-having something (I refuse to take my blood test to confirm it D:) that makes your blood pressure low, and makes you feel faint easily and have difficulty breathing. I'm already pushing myself a lot for sailing. I don't give two hoots about what you say but trying to diss every thing I pointed out? That's low.
If I really was the person you were trying to make me sound like during that so-called 'level bonding time', I would've gone home on the first afternoon of camp. You had NO IDEA how fucking pain my head felt, how many times I cried before you came cuz it hurt so badly, or how drained out I was cuz of Sports Day. You didn't see me when I suddenly stopped running and just sat down on the pavement outside school to grab my head while crying. Only Amanda and Wenfeng did, and she had to help me back inside school, where I cried even more cuz I felt so useless.
Besides the juniors, Wenfeng was really caring, telling me to skip the stations thing we did on the first day even tho I insisted on doing it, which I eventually did.
The whole "Some people were already sitting down after the first round of running" part of your little pointing-out talk. Think I didn't realise that I was the only sec4 sitting down after one round of running with the group?
Talking to WF during the 'bonding session' after Mrs Sidhu's mental preparation really helped. Even tho I cried infront of him, I didn't feel bad. Thats where I say, YOU have no freaking idea how bad I was feeling since day 1 of the camp; I'm sec4 yet my juniors are more fit than me! What kind of a useless senior am I?
So sometimes, before dissing me and pointing out my flaws in fitness, you should really consider how what you say affects me.
Thanks a lot ah, you should've just put Drey's name in the list of people running for Intercca relay so that you could've subbed in someone else instead of putting down my name when its confirmed I'll be there. I know I suck in running etc. It really made me feel damn bad and guilty for not enabling us to get 1st or something ya.
I know you hate me to the core, but sometimes you could chose better words. :)
And to the other, I'm really tired. Point said, point taken.
Okay enough of ranting. :):):)
Can't wait for interschools. Even tho I'll miss people like Ryan, Wenfeng, Nic W. and Linjie very much, still. I won't have to see or put up with some things anymore.
I love those guys!
But I don't like their scaring me on the last day of camp. Stupid Ryan!
p.s. HAPPY BIRTHDAY LINJIE, 1-DAY-OLDER-THAN-ME 'BRO'!
LOVEEEEEES. He plays LALALA LOVE SONG so nicely!
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