Contradictory? Not quite much.

Decided to change my blog's fonts. Easier on the eyes, hopefully. But I have no idea why my [table] coding is linked to my [.blogtitle] coding, and I am too lazy to find out, since this directly tells me my coding skills have obviously gone rusty.

(edit: got it. Just had to use the "font face=" coding. Gosh am I dumb.)

Btw, some overdues from Cia's Facebook:

This wasn't done on purpose, Mel put the biscuits in the order above and Cia noticed it.

Me and Samir Nasri are so meant to be.

Cia says this is my pout.

I don't get it, she always seems to notice whenever I'm pouting, even if I myself don't realise it. It isn't a pout! POUTS LOOK LIKE THIS- :3

Yes, its my big fat (un)fabulous birthday celebration in the canteen. Haha. Thanks girls, that really made my day.

These people stood by me thru thick and thin, loved me for who I am and made me feel special on the day I was feeling ultimately like shit, so a million and trillion thanks would never suffice.

On the other hand, I realised that I seriously am experiencing the same shit I went thru last year. Same scenarios, same situations, (only) different people.

Last year I remember my birthday wasn't exactly celebrated by AGEK much, and my whole birthday post was literally dedicated to the sailors cuz David, Iggy and Quin bought me a cake or something (I called them my sailing clique in the post HAHA HILARIOUS)? And how I wasn't surprised cuz Jack told me beforehand.. and yeah. And how the bottom of the post was all about someone and how he ruined my birthday in the end. HAHA I GOT THE MAJOR FUNNYS FROM READING IT AGAIN.

This year, my birthday wasn't celebrated by the sailors at all (except for the Polaroid given to me from them, thanks!), and majorly celebrated by AGEK. My whole birthday post was dedicated to them, and yeah THEY bought me a cake this time. And this time it was another person who graced the bottom of my post, but weirdly, compared to last year, you can't consider it "gracing", the way I put it.

So.. same scenario much?

The people/events/things that majorly make me feel so lifeless just turned the tables, literally.

Y'know what? I'm getting sweaty palms now and the aircon's on.

Oh and guess what, since Mommy Dearest won't take me to the doctor's, I decided I would take myself. But I need to save the money first (not willing to spend my current savings!), since I'm not gonna tell her.

Aaaaand I cried again today. HAHA LOSER. Just cuz she scolded me and gave me that big-eyed stare.

Why do I take insults so seriously?

I hate being at home now. I don't WANT to be at home. I read Gigi Torres's blog, and was truly inspired. It'll take me a while before realising how important the people I'm currently rebelling against are to me.

And I decided that after O's, I'm not gonna take whatever sewing courses or whatever I intended to take. I'm gonna focus entirely on dance. Hopefully 2 lessons per week or more. Who said you can't go the extra mile in order to realise your dream?

I need to stop thinking so much. I'm just stressing myself out.
I'm over-sensitive, no one can change a crap of that cuz its me.
But I have a feeling I'm getting more and more disliked, but who cares. I don't give a damn about anything now I guess.


I'm not gonna enjoy April 22nd - 24th. 3 days of being away from 4Endeavour.. sigh. Can't imagine how I used to think 3Endeavour was hell cuz the people I was having a cold war with were all there while sailing was heaven cuz all my best friends were there.

And how now I'm thinking 4Endeavour is heaven while sailing is hell cuz all the people I'm having cold war with are there.


p.s. Yesterday Zhien asked me why I wasn't online on MSN but online on Facebook. Well to be honest, I've not gone online on MSN for quite some time now. :) no one talks to me there and I don't find a need to talk to anyone.