It will only bring you Down

Today (17th May) was awesome! I think I met my dream guy at dance. *Dreamy sigh*

I was smiling and laughing damn loudly like an idiot the whole time at dance today. HAHA.

My knees hurt quite badly whenever I bent them, and I'm a bit worried about that. Apart from that, I think the Poppeye's Mel and I had for lunch was rejected by my tummy cuz I had diarrhea when I got home and the whole day I felt terribly uncomfortable.

Having not eaten fast food for a really long time, I'm presuming that's why I felt so sickish.


The dance for this event's kinda silly actually. Well what can I say? The song itself was stupid. JJ Lin sung it, so its kinda disappointing? Sounds like an "OH the deadline for this song is tomorrow! Alright, I'll come up with some stupid tune to go along with it.." thing. The end result?

"Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah, HEY! Oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah, HO! You are the one Singapore, now it's your time to-"

-.-

Oh by the way if you guys wanna come down and see the flash mob, its on this Thursday and next Sunday! More details so check back on this okay? There'll be like 200 youths and Jae (the name "Jae" makes me think of Jaebeom oppa. I was so heartbroken when I saw Sylvia's text telling me to "message Jae for more details about perf and prac!" cuz I could only think of my darling Park Jaebeom T_T) promised us he'll book this area for us and we'll have a party/celebration in early June! EXCITED.

Hung around Dhoby Ghaut 'till quite late. Was supposed to go to ahmah's house but it was too late so Elie and I went to find Cheryl at Hougang Plaza and played pool! Whoopwhoop.

Gabriel, Ben and CY are all saying I'm a pool addict.

*Cough* They play pool more often *cough* than me! *COUGH COUGH COUGH CHOKES*


Called Fred and told him to come back cuz I wanted to play with him.

I have a new nickname for him: HUMBLE APPLE (Crumble) PIE.

He played with them for a while, and when Cheryl left I changed our table and left to withdraw money with her, telling Fred to teach Elie how to play.

When I came back she played against me and she won?! I was shocked cuz she improved from not being able to get any balls in to winning me. Okay fine its cuz I was clearing the black ball and I told them I'd get it in the one at the corner but I got it into the middle. But Elie only had one ball left to clear before going for the black ball.

'Tis the power of Humble Apple Pie the Shifu. He and Darry taught me most of the things I know about pool. Hahaha I still blame them for getting me hooked onto pool! :)

Then Humble Apple Pie challenged me and I won once. Still feels good whenever I win him.

He then challenged me one last time before we left, telling Elie the match would be less than 5mins and that he'll trash me in this round. Hah in the end I was still pretty alright! Didn't get trashed totally. I think I've improved :)

Left around 11pm+ and walked to the bus interchange. The telly said 165 was still in service but we waited around and it never came so he just advised us to take a cab. Sigh I feel so broke. Why can't Singapore have buses and trains running after 12am? Ridiculous.

Meeting Cheryl at Cineleisure for pool again tomorrow!

I'm gonna try learning this song on my keyboard. I remember how when I was sec4, this song was overrated because EVERYONE was playing it. (Mayflower Sec has three pianos that students can access)

Now.. Should I eat my dinner? At 4:49AM? :S

"See, I'm a wreck inside. My tongue is tied and my whole body feels so weak."

The future may be all I really need.
And it might be wonderful,
It might be magical,
It might be everything I'm waiting for;
A miracle.
Oh, but even if I fall in love again with someone new,
It can never be the way,
No it will never be the way...


I've been listening to Selena Gomez's songs, and I'm starting to love her as a singer.

Remember how I said I'd sleep early on my Facebook status update?

Well, I lied.

Fred asked me to call and as usual, our phone conversations don't end 'till 2, 3 or 4am. He got me playing Bejewelled again. Oh the horror. I used to be terribly addicted to that game in the past. Something like what he is now? I'm trying to beat his hi-score of 297k. Goodness.

Was extremely frustrated over 3 things and I briefly elaborated each one to him. If he wasn't there for me to rant to, I would've gone nuts. I was close to punching walls. Another personality trait of mine I detest: Not being able to control myself when people ignore me or keep me in suspense. (Now you all know why I spam text messages and MSN messages if you don't reply for a few hours. And I'm referring to a lot of people when it comes to this.)

I don't know why, but I get a terrible headache because I force myself to think hard why I'm being ignored, then when I can't figure I'd shake my legs damn hard and I become extremely negative and the whole cycle repeats.

That's my weakness. That's why I told Darren I'm not strong.

Talked to Hito about this and she was like, "._. Gotta control yourself!"

My three problems? One bothers me too much, one doesn't bother me at all, and the last one just.. is.



It rained earlier and I was happy that it was pouring instead of it being like a light on-off drizzle.




Ended up playing with the rain instead of closing the windows. My pillows and even my piano got a bit wet! The sleeves of my teeshirt were too. The water was cold but I love the carefree feeling you get when you stick your hands out in the rain.

Playing in the rain always reminds me of 3 people: J., * and this kind uncle who sheltered me when it was raining on my way home from school.

I remember how J. said he was embarassed when I played in the rain in school because I'd stick my head out of the railing and end up getting my hair all wet. Then he said I would be like a kid, sticking my hands out and smiling like a retard. When we were still together he saw me playing with the rain during recess once since his classroom was one floor above the sec2's? Mad embarassing.

For the kind uncle.. There was once I was walking home from the bus stop in the rain. It was pouring and I bent my body over to protect my bag (even though it was a waterproof backpack I didn't want to take the risk) so I was totally drenched. Worse still I had to wait for the traffic light under the tree at AMK Mac's side of the road.

I was standing under the tree shivering and my arms were wet so I was afraid the rainwater might've already gotten to my bag, but suddenly I didn't feel the rainwater running down my face. I looked up to see this bus uncle shelthering me. He told me it was alright and I awkwardly uttered a soft "Thank you". He sheltered me across the road and asked if I was staying near by.

Those who've walked to my house from Hub would know its quite a far walk in with not much shelter. But I didn't wanna bother the uncle so I told him I stayed at the block right infront of the bus stop he sheltered me to, only to run home.

Needless to say I enjoyed running home in the rain. But when I got to the lift I realised my uniform became.. transparent. And.. girls don't like that. Even my skirt was completely soaked.

Alright, my yawns are getting more frequent.

Can't wait for the performance practice tomorrow. Gonna be awesome!

Bored/Stoning

Was at home alone the whole day today.

Guess who accompanied me?




Doggone the stuffed toy dog! (Yes its a stupid name for a stuffed toy dog but I named it in sec 1 when I got it as a birthday present from Sera and Jane! Can't blame me.)

This little fella never fails to be by my side. Especially on the days I just feel moody and feel like tearing up. I wish it were a real dog though.. I'd be on cloud nine!

So yeah I spent the whole day at home watching Animax, playing Sims 2.. Basically I was too lazy to go for badminton today since I have like a week full of dancing ahead of me and I woke up with my shoulders and neck feeling real sore today. Couldn't turn my neck. Felt like what you'd experience after wakeboarding/cable skiing, and that sucks big time.

Well, I'm planning to sleep earlier today so that I can wake up early to revise some Social Studies chapters and complete my Emath homework.. which are all on the chapter of GRAPHS.

I swear. If I were a mathematician, I wouldn't have invented graphs.


Found this photo on Photobucket. The colouring of the photo's so pretty but the moment captured.. even more so. Its beautiful.

Love is beautiful. But it can also be the most harmful thing on Earth.

It makes you feel lost, vulnerable.. and every other emotion you wish you'd never experience again.

I mean, not like I'm saying that's how I feel right now. And honestly, what is a relationship without its downs? How are you to know if that someone truly loves you unless he's willing to love you through everything? And right now I only feel excited. Excited for one thing: dance. Just thinking of the performance on Thursday and Sunday's getting my mood up and adrenaline pumpingggg.

It may only be a 2 minute-long dance, but I'll still enjoy it anyway! And I can get to wear the ICF pants I finally collected from Twin! 40bucks.. Better wear it as and when I can. The pocket's (I took a photo. Its below) really cute! Not your typical straight-cut pocket, but a wavy one.

Alright, blog more tomorrow after or before dance! See you!

Personality

One personality trait of mine that I absolutely abhor: I MUST know exactly what's going on.

Two instances to prove it: Last time I went to NTUC with Aaron and Darren after playing L4D2, they kept saying, "Hm.. should we tell her? Nah later la." or, "Aaron why don't YOU tell!" Cuz they were gossiping about someone but I didn't catch who it was, as usual. I had a rough idea but they kept saying they'd tell me later or and when I guessed they would go "I don't know. Maaaaybe? :P"

Bullshit. I went nuts when they did that.

I told Darren while at Vivo cuz we were talking about being strong and all and he was like, "We didn't know omg haha sorry!!"

Another person who tested this theory out was Spencer. We were supposed to meet the next day and he had something to tell me, but he went, "I lazy to type it all out here! Tell you tomorrow k. :)" and I gave up asking.

Within half an hour or so, I was back in that MSN conversation window asking him, "Eh I can't figure. Tell me!!!"

Calm my Frazzled Nerves

Went to Vivo for a rooftop HTHT yesterday with the BFFs.

Aaron didn't make it though. :(

Had dinner with them (the hor fun from Kopitiam tastes like crap, DO NOT order it no matter how desperate you are for hor fun!) before Alex and I satisfied out BBT cravings.

Alex and I were extremely exhausted. Was gonna take out my specs to wear to hide my tired eyes because all I could feel were my eyes closing, so Darren suggested we go get drinks from Daiso.



Lex and I bought Blended Coffee (not the black canned one in the photo. Its the brown one) and we didn't like it much.

I still prefer Nestle's mocha etc.!

Went to see the puppies at the pet shop and they were so friggin' cute! Especially this golden retriever of 4 months. If photography was allowed inside I would've taken a photo. Actually I doubt the staff there care because there wasn't any near the golden retriever I was going nuts over.

It's fur colour was.. different. A really pretty shade of gold.

If I could get a dog, I'd get that. My dream dogs are big dogs, namely golden retrievers and great danes. I doubt they'd allow a great dane in Singapore though.. I've never actually seen anyone in Singapore walk a great dane in parks or out on the streets.

And I'm guessing its cuz great danes are THIS big:

Which Singaporean would have the time to take care of a dog this big? Especially since we're all either too lazy to put in the effort required when it comes to owning a dog, or we're just swarmed with too much work that we don't have time for a huge dog.

And no, that isn't a dalmation. But I think great danes are in the same family as the dalmation.

We talked about a lot while we were there, lying on the ground facing the sky. 'Twas a cloudy day though, so no stars. Was pretty bummed out about that.

One thing I took note was that Darren said Alex and I are actually very strong. Not strong physically but mentally. For Alex yeah I would say she's strong, but me? I really find myself rather weak. I may be strong on the outside, but I break and crumble extremely easily especially when it comes to relationships. Not only BGRs, but in terms of friends too. I've experienced too much to call myself "strong". Primary school.. Secondary school... I already have the evidence to prove otherwise.

But yeah, I guess when I "fall", I stand back up regardless. I may mope around for a long while but after that..

..I only come back up stronger.


I really like this one thing Darren said: "If you were to fall, fall forward."






















Yes, I love my Vans and I really need to get a new pair soon. :(

I watched a video of Monica Parales and this girl Alexa (not Alexis) dancing and I think Alexa danced in her old-school Vans.

Ouch. I wouldn't dare dance in this baby of mine.

I love nights where I blog using my cellphone because I feel more intellectual.

''Oh my God. It's almost 5.'' Was the first reaction I had when I was done snapping random photos of my room.

(And yes, my room's terribly messy now.)

When you're all alone, all you can do is reflect on the day's activities, so on, so forth.

Lying on my bed -- head on my pillows and legs sprawled all over my quilt in an unwomanly fashion --, I felt like.. Something was missing. Like.. there's suddenly a void in my life.

Then I start to think about why, and that brought me back to today. Somehow, I DO know why.

The hardest thing for anyone to do is to admit that they have no other option other than this particular one, that they are given no other damned choices. Its hard to understand that this is it, its make it or break it. I still wonder how people can actually perceive me as a strong person (and by ''someone'' I mean Darren G.), when I find myself the most frail, most fragile being on Earth.

More tomorrow. Will upload photos taken today (now yesterday as it's technically past 12am).

1Endeavour'06

I was about to do this super long photo-spam post, but I decided to leave it for later because I would rather enjoy looking at these old photos of mine first!

I decided to redownload iTunes today. Took out my external hard disc, plugged it in, and found myself looking through my old photos instead of transferring my songs into the new laptop.

1Endeavour'06.. MFSS Sailing Team '06-'09.. And 3-4Endeavour '08-'09.

Awesome photos. They make me wonder why I never did treasure secondary school life more.

2006 was the best year for me in secondary school. In my opinion, being the class chairperson of 1Endeavour'06 was the best thing that ever happened to me. I never regret the day ah Swee forcefully raised my hand in class when Mrs Thomas asked if anyone wanted to volunteer to be class chair. I whispered to her, "I want to try being the chairperson.. But don't dare to raise my hand.. Nevermind la." and she just "MRS THOMAS!!!" *forces my hand up*

The signatures and little heartfelt messages written by the 1E'06 people on my class photo never fail to make me smile, even 'till now. Messages like "You're the best chairwoman Gwennie!" and "Yay you were an awesome cehh-meh Gwennie-poo! Good luck for next year!! :D".. Aw they make me miss being in 1Endeavour'06.

Being the chairperson was hard, especially when it came to collecting ANYTHING. Money, money, money! Never was easy collecting class funds etc. from them. And PE.. PE always made us late for 氾老师's Chinese lessons. She scolded me many times for not rushing everyone back to class. Haha!

But seriously, I'm thankful that 'till this day we're all still keeping in touch with one another? And having class gatherings every year. Though it takes a damn long time to plan these gatherings amongst all the confusion and messed up dates, I really think its worth it.

I should let the photos do the talking! ;)

BEST CLASSROOM REARRANGEMENT EVER!

Ker (1E Treasurer), Shriram (Vice-Chair), and Cia.

We were rearranging the classroom for our Art MYEs. Having to rearrage the tables and chairs into a circle shape was really hard.. so we figured, why not just dump all the chairs in the middle?

And that was the end result ;)

Our skirts..
Oh goodness. Can't believe we had skirts that long back then.

Easiest way to identify the only two girl sailors in the '06 sailing batch?

By looking at the hands. Darkest two hands belong to Quin and Gwen.
(Can you spot us? The last two hands to the extreme bottom-left.)

Our first class gathering held on teachers' day!

What's a class gathering without some of our teachers?
Miss Oh, Miss Ng, Mr Raihan, Mr Ho and Miss Cheng!
(English trainee-back-then/?/D&T/History/Geog)

Can't believe Mr Ho was my teacher for.. a good whole 4 years! Hahaha.

I have more photos from all the class gatherings of '07, '08, '09 and '10! See, since 2006 we've been having class gatherings! How awesome are we, you tell me?! ;)

Anyways, to relive more 1E'06 moments..

http://oneendeavour-ohsixties.blogspot.com/


p.s. I really want to have another 1E'06 gathering!

p.p.s. I read some of my old blog posts in 2006-2007 and.. My goodness. I feel embarassed that I used to blog like that!

My blog posts in 2005 were far worse. What did primary school do to me?!

Grace of Hip Hop

Hopefully gonna attend Hip Hop 1 at O School! Now that they relocated themselves to Orchard Road, its gonna be way easier to get to as compared to Studio Wu.

I want to attend An An's classes because she focuses more on groove than body control etc. Thinking back, if I joined O School's Popping and Locking courses last year with Twin, I would prolly not make it far because my techniques suck. I have no control but I have big movement. Crystal told me back when I was sec2 that big movement is usually good for performance, but body control is still essential.

Time to do the old training method: Putting these plastic chips all over my arms and legs, and doing isolation movements without dropping the chips.

Which is technically IMPOSSIBLE. Can you imagine? In sec2 that was how Crystal trained me, Pam and Bettina? We had these coloured chips all over and everytime we popped and isolated, chips would drop. Then came the punishment which was pumping I think.


Went to NYP to meet Twinnie (Mingwei) and later for lunch, Hito!

She said she'll get up by 9, do research for her project and come down by 1? I called her at 1 after meeting Twin and she was like, "I'm still at homeeeee." Kept telling her to hurry cuz I had a damn bad gastric attack and I was sitting on the floor at Shopping Arcade holding my stomach. People who walked by kept looking at me.. Not like I cared. Didn't eat the whole morning since I was supposed to meet Twin at 12 but I LEFT the house at 12.20pm. Was talking to Fred on the phone and I was like, "Omg I feel like hurling.." "You feel like vomiting?" "YA."

When I met Twin, I saw Benjamin Wee sitting at the same table as him! Haha I found out from FB that they were in the same class. Small world cuz Benjamin was my pri1-4 classmate in Aitong School.

I was like, "HEY BENJAMIN!!!"

He gave me a blank look. "Eh?"

"I'm Gwen la!"

"OH! HI!!!"

"Can you do that finger thing still?"

"You mean this?? *Bends his pinky finger backwards to touch his wrist*"

And somehow, all the girls sitting around him went "OH MY GOD!!", and they said it in a fascinated tone. The last time he did that in primary 4, it was to gross out the girls of Pri 4F.

I saw Marcus Tay as I was walking into the canteen too! I didn't go say hi though since I was alone. Can you imagine? Both of my pri1-4 classmates sitting in the same canteen at the same time! I wonder if Benjamin still remembers Marcus..


Hito came, forced me to eat (I told her I didn't want to and she was like EAT!!!) and we went to her classroom. She told me it would be cold, but I didn't believe her. An hour flew past and I found myself rushing out to defrost myself.

In the end I walked home since she had to finish both her projects, both due tomorrow. Didn't wanna disturb her haha.

Talked to Wifey on the way home. Perspired like a pig. Goodness, what's wrong with the weather!?

Came home and Dad said he was gonna go eat dinner at Hub with Gerald and Mom. Didn't go with them cuz I felt too tired. Oh well. Not like that mattered, I stayed home watching more dance videos!

Did I ever mention how much I love Monica Parales?

When I first watched Team Millennia Junior videos of her, I couldn't stop because she's just awesome.

Heres to hoping I'd be as good as her one day. :)

Down, down, down, down, down

Might be going back to Studio Wu for lessons by this week! Haha collecting my pants from Twinnie this Wednesday. This is like what, the 19282832th time we mentioned collecting it so yep. Better move that lazy butt of mine and go meet him. Will be meeting Alex and Gabriel for pool after that and then I'll head to the library with Alex to study. Got to do my History and SS notes.. gosh, I've been saying that since forever but I keep focusing on Emath.

Reading Twin's blog made me realise that maybe O School might be a better choice for me? Even if it IS in Orchard. So I'll be feeling + looking like shit everytime after lessons, then I got to walk past the crowd in Orchard. Hm..

Oh well SW's in Dhoby Ghaut! Located INSIDE SIM University. Makes it even worse right? I remember Bern and I having to walk through SIM twice a week.. felt damn awkward cuz we have to walk past their study areas and they'll all be looking at us.

I CANNOT WAIT!!

BTR

Been watching Nickelodeon the whole of today and they kept advertising Big Time Rush!

I find all of them pretty cute! Haha. Especially James Maslow.


He looks good in most of the photos I saw. Then again, he also looks like a girl in most! His eyes are drop-dead GORGEOUSSSS. If I knew a guy with eyes like his I'd just fall in love with them. Love at first sight HAHA. But of course, no one can beat Nathan Kress. He plays Freddie (Fredward Benson) on iCarly. The only reason I watch iCarly is cuz of him hahaha! Yeah I know, pretty dumb. I'm 17 and I still watch iCarly. What to do? Eye candy :P

Which reminds me, I've not blogged about Nathan Kress for quite a while. Especially since all my photos/icons of him are in the old laptop! *heartbreak*

YES I'M A FANGIRL DEAL WITH IT!

(Thinks about this particular Scrubs episode.. Josephine: "I'm your doctor. DEAL WITH IT." Dr. Cox: "Why don't you always talk that way?" You gotta watch till the end to see that part.)

And oh, watch this clip! Space Invaders. HAHAHA damn funny. Ben showed it to me yesterday and it made me laugh like maaad.

I love Zach Braff. I think he's an awesome actor. But sadly season 9 of Scrubs has like a totally new cast? Only Zach Braff, John McGinley and Donald Faison stay on. No Elliot?! How is Scrubs.. well, Scrubs, without Elliot!?

Minho!

Today when I was really feeling stressed out and frustrated, Aaron gave me the link to this song while comforting me, telling me the song would sooth my nerves.

And surprisingly it works just as well as 'Details in the Fabric' by Jason Mraz. Awesome song - simple lyrics with a deep meaning to them. I've been listening to Jason Mraz and James Morrison's songs so often since * that I've decided to go down to HMV to look for their albums. See, I'm not that bad. I'll support the singers if I really like them.

Like SHINee! I bought their album cuz I love Minho and Jonghyun oppa.

Oh, speaking of which, I found some photos of Minho that made me squeal infront of the computer! Hahah its been a while since I last did that, even if Minho, Jonghyun and Taemin's photos have been on my wall since.. ever.

Friggin' cute!! But from here you can tell that he did do a bit of surgery on his eyes.

And yes I know he DID do surgery on his nose. Which SHINee fan doesn't know that?

HAHA I LOVE IT WHEN HE DOES THIS!
LUVLUVLUV

Ack my future husband must have this hairstyle. So cuteeee!

I think out of all the photos I've seen of him, I love his hair the most in this photo. He and Eunhyuk have the same shades of brown in their hair! Haha.

As compared to his usual straight boring hair.. Hm, yeah this is the nicest. Curly hair! :)

But of course, I still love the photos where he wears caps. Aw~

Its been a while since I last blogged about Minho, SHINee, or any Korean-related thing. I realised I lost interest after Jaebeom left 2PM. The Korean music scene's damn horrible.

http://realityworks.blogspot.com/search/label/Minho

Still find the post with the photo of stick-thin Taeminnie (scroll down a bit) damn sad. Doesn't it look like SM Entertainment's starving the SHINee members?!